Support

Thank you so much for all of the supportive words. The overwhelming consensus was to pay off debt. And like "Anonymous" said (who is my mother by the way) I already knew what to do, I already had the solution, it was just a matter of reminding myself of our ultimate goals.

I always feel like I need something profound to say. I always feel like I need to write moving narratives that inspire others. i read so many blogs that are inspiring, and make me want to be better person, I want the same feeling to be what my readers get.

But, I am not a profound person, and this is not why I blog. I am not looking for sympathy, or comments to the contrary, I am simply stating that the words I write here, unless specified otherwise, are for the benefit of me and my family.

Braxton-your anger is getting better, you are SO SMART!!! I know the day will come very soon when you come home and mom is unable to help with your homework. I am debating now on whether to have you tested, I think you could skip kindergarten, you have preschool this semester and head start next year. At the end of head start mom and dad will look at it again. I just really want you not to be bored in class, i want school to remain challenging so that you will stay there, and enjoy it.

Michael- you are my sweet little man. Always giving kisses, and big squeezes. You want to constantly be with your big brother, but not be like him just with him. You are your own person. I am slightly concerned about your hearing. You have a definite speech impediment and I really wonder some times if you can hear what I am say at all? I have contacted the people to get your hearing checked but have yet to hear anything back from them.

Caden- you are so happy, and content. Not a big crier and happy to just sit on the floor and talk to who ever will listen. Even if no body is listening you just babble away. (I think you are talking to angels). Yesterday you sat up on your own for the first, and on Monday you got up onto all fours and rocked back and forth. I love it and can not wait to see you running and playing with your big brothers.

Chad- the words I say to you are simple. You are my best friend. I love you. I am SO proud of you.

Katy- your crazy! :)

Torn

I am so torn!

Our first post of 2011 was about our strong desire to be out of debt! This is going VERY slow. We are trying hard, and continue to live with in our means, and struggle to stay positive, but progress is progress no mater how small.

So my dilemma is this, Michael broke our camera about eight months ago, and we had planned on using our tax return to purchase a new one. But our return was not as large as expected. So now I am torn! Do we use the money as intended and buy the camera, or do we use the money and pay down the debt?

I am really struggling internally with this. I need some input, some opinions.

I want the camera so bad, but it is a WANT! I miss taking pictures of my kids, and I am so afraid that I will miss documenting the early years of their sweet little life's.

But the NEED to get out of debt is a really strong one too! If we pay off debt, it will bring us closer to our ultimate goal. However, we will not have the funds again to buy a camera until all debt is gone and we can save the money to buy one. This could be up to two years!!! :(

But I know that getting out of debt is a great goal, and I believe that the Lord will bless us for following this counsel.


Oh gosh please give me your help!

Great pictures!!

Caden's baby blessing!


This picture makes me smile! I love these three men! I can not believe how big they are!


My mother in-law took some pictures of my sweet family when she came down for a Caden's baby blessing. She took this gem, and given recent events it has become a favorite!! I think they look a lot alike.

Love you grandpa, and we are praying for you daily!

Soul Bearing

Not this past Saturday but the one before my grandpa Coombs suffered from a stroke. This man is one that has ALWAYS been in my mind. Our relationship has been building slowly through the years, and I now have such a full heart I have to write.

When I first heard that my grandfather had suffered this stroke I cried, I was in shock and I was very sad. But really I went on with my day and my week. I live farther away than most of my family and I do not hear or see them daily. It is hard not get swept away in my own little Cedar City life. But my sweet grandpa has been hiding, deep with in my heart, waiting to be remembered. As I said before my relationship with my grandfather has just recently been developing. In fact I said to my mom when they all came down for Caden’s baby blessing, that the conversations held then with my amazing grandparents was the first time I felt like an adult talking with adults.

No I would not have any of you believe that the relationship was weak or insignificant, if you know my grandparents you know that their hearts are ALWAYS open. The relationship was not what is should be because of me. I have always been so intimidated by my mom’s family. The term “Walking among giants” is a really good way to describe the family, and my grandpa in my eyes is the GREATEST most LOVING man alive today. I always wanted to feel closer to him, but up until now I have let my insecurities with my own family hold me back.

I am not saying that tomorrow everything will change, or that I am now going to act and feel differently around them all. In fact I bet this blog will come as a surprise to many of them. But I am going to try to lower my guards, stop caring and just love, and let them love me.

This situation with my grandfather has been so difficult for all of our family; the blogs have been filled with good and bad days. We are all coming together as one unit to support and build up the patriarch and matriarch of our family.

I have to blog today to say that I love my grandpa so much. I want him to be around for A LOT longer so that I can build the relationship I want to have with him. I want my children to truly meet this man and understand him; I want to truly understand him.

Although I am so sad that the things have happened to my grandfather, and that he is struggling now, but I am grateful that this has made me realize that I am part of this family. And the thoughts of doubt, the insecurities and negative feelings, were 100% self induced, and if I want to build a relationship with my grandparents, I have to make the steps to have it.

I did not mean this blog to be so depressing, or to bare my soul’s secrets so fully but there you have it. Please help me.

Grandpa Coombs, you are an amazing man. You are a true lover of the gospel and someone that I try to emulate. I love you. I love your smile. I love your singing. I love you calm confidence. I love the way you teach life lessons to your family. I love that you are so willing to share. I am so grateful that you chose to be married for time and all eternity, and raised your children in the gospel. Thank you for being my grandpa. I pray our relationship just gets stronger and stronger!

I love you,
KATY